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Wrong Saxton is on the ballot

Election day may not be till Nov. 7, but at least in the governor's race the results already are in. And the winner - based solely, I must admit, on the results of recent TV commercials - has to be Lynne Saxton. …

I mean, where else can you find someone with the same charisma and ability to articulate the issues of the day? Not to mention a track record unsullied by inaction or bad judgment. … What's that you say? She's the wife of one of the candidates? Oh, never mind. … Seriously folks, this woman has a career in politics if she wants it.

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In Mark Schorr's new thriller, 'Borderline,' someone is bumping off all the nastiest crooks in P-town - and it might even be someone in city government. …Well, that's one way to keep crime statistics down, I guess. It's fiction, of course, but the idea had to come from somewhere. … Good Dog, Bad Dog, the sausage emporium on Southwest Alder, is gone. There's a lock on the door and a for-lease sign on the window. … To take the words right out of faithful reader Stephen Sasser's mouth: 'Dog gone.'

Over at Ray's Ragtime on Southwest Morrison, proprietor Ray Tillotson isn't one to be overly impressed when the stars stop by - as former child star Molly Ringwald did while starring in the traveling production of 'Sweet Charity' earlier this month. … But boy, was he ever knocked on his can when, out of the blue, she sent him a top hat - now on display at the retro clothing establishment - that she used in one of the show's dance numbers. Just in case, says Tillotson slyly, you haven't finished your Halloween shopping yet. … Blogging professor Jack Bogdanski has a funny bit going on former City Council candidate Emilie Boyles - all done, of course, with one of those computer programs that allows you to monkey around with photographs. … This time, it's Boyles as a nun, lighting candles in a cathedral. … Before that, Boyles somewhere on a deserted Caribbean beach, obviously enjoying herself. … Where is she, anyway? And how'd she get away with that $92 thou or so of all that, heh-heh, Clean Money? See it for yourself at http://bojack.org.

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More hot political news for those who might be wondering why your mail-in ballot instructs you to 'Use a pencil or blue ink pen' - when, if you're like me, you always thought blue was a no-no. … According to the nice lady at county voting headquarters, it's the other way around now. In order to save money - because black ink apparently is very expensive - the big ink manufacturers have started mixing red with their black, which actually makes it harder for the county's machines to scan. Next question: Why do I get started on things like this? … And then there's the woman spotted driving north on McLoughlin in a beat-up red Subaru with all the obligatory anti-administration political messages affixed to its rear bumper. Plus a hand-lettered sign, prominently displayed in the rear window: 'I'm a sucker for men with eyeliner.' Somehow, though, I don't think it would make her one bit happier if George W. started wearing eye makeup. … The political season seems to be heating up.

Contact Phil Stanford by phone, 503-546-5166, or by e-mail at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..