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He can get it for you wholesale

The diamond hustler Ñ we'll call him Mr. A Ñ doesn't really have an office. He works out of the safe deposit vault of one of Portland's finer downtown banks, which is where he keeps his stash. É Mr. A gets a lot of his customers through a streetwise filly named Miss B, whose latest find is an octogenarian from one of Portland's finer families Ñ we'll call him Mr. C Ñ who's got a sweetie in Seattle. Rumor has it that Mr. C has already bought her a diamond bracelet as well as a carat-plus dangler on a chain, and is currently in the process of selecting a large stone for a friendship ring. Of course, Miss B gets $500 each time he buys something. É But as my informant says, why not? Everybody gets what they want. Nobody gets hurts. Hey, what a deal.

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No, the exclusive Multnomah Athletic Club (only 20,000 members) does not want unapproved candidates running for its board of trustees. Last week the board itself sent out a letter advising members of the unsurpassed leadership skills of the four official candidates, while apologizing for the inconvenience presented by the candidacy of upstart Bill Opray, who Ñ gasp Ñ actually requested a mailing list so he could present his own case. É Shame on him. Doesn't he realize the fate of western civilization hangs in the balance?

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'This Enron stuff is getting out of hand,' says local comedian John Wetteland. 'I called PGE to check on my bill, and they took the Fifth.' In case you didn't know, until about two years ago, John was practicing law here in Portland. 'Just practicing,' he says.

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Happy birthday to retired Portland school teacher Rose Lincoln, who will be 102 on March 2. Some of her former students Ñ Rose taught from 1918 to 1965, if that gives you any idea Ñ are organizing a party at the downtown Marriott. For reservations, call Diane at 503-266-9533.

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The Graysons, Jeff and Sue, have moved out of their mansion in the West Hills and into a more modest apartment as they await the opening of Jeff's trial next month. Son Barclay already has pleaded guilty to one count of mail fraud in the Capital Consultants scandal, but he hasn't had to report to prison yet because his wife is pregnant. He's expected to testify against his father at trial. É If Jeffrey, who just short months ago had his name on a building at the U of O, goes down, that'll make three successive generations of the family Ñ his mother had her problems with the IRS Ñ who will have done time. É That is, if there's a federal prison out there equipped to handle a multiple sclerosis victim who uses a wheelchair. It's a great tragedy Ñ not least of all for all the workers whose union pension funds, under the care of Capital Consultants, went bye-bye to the tune of about $300 million.

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Lousy luck story of the week goes to Jenika, who lives in Southeast Portland. She was turning off I-205 when she was hit by a tow truck making an illegal left-hand turn. The damage was serious enough that her car had to be towed. É Which, of course, the kindly tow truck driver agreed to do Ñ charging her $153 for his services. Top that one if you can.

Contact Phil Stanford by phone at 503-546-5166 or by e-mail at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .