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Now kids can take Rasheed to lunch

Whatever possessed the good folks at Jiffy Lube to run those TV commercials for 'Rasheed Wallace limited-edition lunchboxes'? É Surely someone over there must have heard that he recently got off a seven-game suspension for physically threatening a referee after a Blazer game. É 'You realize,' says the young lady from the Ostler Group, the marketing agency responsible for the ad, 'that the decision was made over a year ago.' É Oh, that was back during the season when he led the league in technical fouls, after setting a record the season before. É And this is a promotion aimed at schoolkids, no less. É Someone over there needs an oil change or something.

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Don't know about you, but whenever I hear about the state's 'budget shortfall' Ñ which is just about all the time these days Ñ I wonder how long it'll be before someone figures out that all we have to do is put a couple of riverboat casinos on the Willamette, and just like that it'll be gone. É It's not like we haven't already legalized more kinds of gambling than just about every other state in the union. We have dog racing, horse racing, lotteries, sports betting, video poker and full-service gambling establishments on Indian reservations Ñ so why not a few floating casinos? É My question is: Whose interests are we really protecting? Certainly not the schoolkids'.

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Noted plaintiff's lawyer Greg Kafoury is suing the Exotica International Club for Men for 'invasion of privacy' on behalf of nude dancers B.D., A.R., T.M. et al É According to the complaint, pictures of their live performances in the club out on Northeast Columbia Boulevard somehow ended up on a similarly named Web site without their knowledge or permission. The complaint also alleges that videostream cameras had even been placed in the club's dressing rooms. É The dancers, who apparently are so bashful that they can be identified only by their initials, want $100,000 in damages. É The courtroom should be packed for this one. É This has got to be a first: Buffalo bento at the James Bean Cafe on Southwest Second and Taylor. Sunny, who works behind the cash register, tells me it has less cholesterol than beef. Tastes good, though. É Everyone's favorite federal agency, the General Services Administration, has finally figured out how to wash the windows over at the new federal courthouse on Southwest Third Avenue. After several years of pigeon droppings, things were getting a mite crusty over there. Good work, fellas.

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Local rockabilly guitarist Rudy Grayzell, who toured with Elvis Presley back in the mid-'50s, will be playing at Duff's Garage, located at Southeast Seventh and Market, this Saturday night. É Which brings us to our little quiz for the day: Did you know that on Sept. 2, 1957, at the height of his musical career, Elvis performed right here in P-town at what was then called Multnomah Stadium? Well, sir, it's an actual fact. É He was driven across the infield to the stage in a white Lincoln convertible, with the new mayor, Terry Schrunk, seated in the front seat. É '14,600 Fans Squeal, Jump, As Elvis Shakes, Gyrates,' reported The Oregonian in a front-page headline. É Rudy 'Tutti' Grayzell, who says he got his nickname from the King himself at a concert in Tulsa, Okla., is due to start at 9:30 p.m. See y'all there.

Contact Phil Stanford by phone at 503-546-5166 or by e-mail at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .