Matthew LaFollette, the bookkeeper over at Central Drug on Southwest Fourth and Alder, was standing outside the store just before noon Wednesday, smoking a cigarette and watching the guy from the city remove the heads from the old mechanical parking meters. É The new electronic meters were already in place and ready to go Ñ but since the old meters were there, of course, everyone had plugged them. É Matthew watched as the guy from the city worked his way down Taylor, leaving one headless meter after another behind him. É And he was watching a minute or so later, when, to his astonishment, a meter reader came by, slapping parking citations on the windshields of every car parked along the street Ñ because, of course, none of them displayed tickets from the new meters in their windows. 'I still can't believe it,' says Matthew, who is normally a hard guy to impress.

• • •

The wife of federal appeals judge Diarmuid O'Scannlain is reportedly furious with him for wanting to turn the Pioneer Courthouse Post Office into a private parking garage for himself and his colleagues. É At least, that's the word from last weekend's Dorchester Conference, a Lincoln City get-together for Republican muckety-mucks, where a senior lawyer from Stoel Rives was overheard chuckling about it with one of the conference organizers. É The judge himself will neither confirm nor deny the vile rumor, as well he shouldn't.

• • •

The Water Closet Media ad shows a young man and woman chitchatting at a party. Superimposed on the picture are the words:

Hair: Perfect

Body: Perfect

Chemistry: Perfect

Followed by the punch line:

Now don't go home

to a messy bedroom.

What in the world? É Turns out, it's an ad for Domestica, a household cleaning service owned by Shannon Latimer, who probably wouldn't mind if you give her a call at 503-222-2334.

• • •

Overheard at Dante's: A Radio Cab driver comes in, yelling, 'OK, who wanted the cab?' The bartender points to a young hipster-looking guy at the bar. É 'Not me,' says the hipster, starting to blush. 'All I wanted was a glass of wine. You know, a É' The cab driver looks at him. 'If it's not too much trouble next time, just say cabernet, OK? É The Classical Chinese Garden folks may not know how their pond could be losing 26 gallons of water a minute, but graphic designer Stephen Sasser has his suspicions. 'Don't they know that just across the street' Ñ at 304 N.W. Second Ave., as a matter of fact Ñ 'there's a little restaurant called Spring Hollow?'

• • •

Hold the phone for another nude-in for peace alert. Who knows, maybe this one will even happen. É Theresa Reed, otherwise known as Darklady, is sending out invitations for what she expects will be a 250-person nude anti-war protest on March 16. It's being sponsored by the Explorers Club, a local New Age-y, 'sex-positive' group usually interested in matters like tantric sex. For more information, check out www.explorers-club.com/peace/. É The event will be on private property, says Theresa, but at the proper time the press will be invited. 'Let's just hope Donald Rumsfeld is watching.' É Now, he wouldn't do that, would he?

Contact Phil Stanford by phone at 503-546-5166 or by e-mail at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .