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A diner is 86ed from supper

PR guy and confirmed foodophile Robert Volz went out for a five-course dinner the other night at Family Supper Ñ which, in case you haven't heard of it, is the new restaurant out on North Interstate that's so exclusive you can't even get in unless you're already on the invitation list. 'Overall,' as Volz acknowledges, 'it was great.' É Once home, however, he fired off an e-mail to the restaurant, complaining, among other things, that the meat was oversalted (as proof of which, he said, he had to sleep with his wedding band on that night) and that the chardonnay for the second course was served in pinot glasses. É Less than an hour later, back came an e-mail from co-owner Michael Hebb: 'You clearly lack the necessary understanding of what we are up to.' 'What I would prefer,' said Hebb, 'is that you stopped attending Family Supper events.' É And you thought things were getting rough over there in Baghdad.

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Anyway, a happy Tax Day to you, too. Everyone who brings an unmailed tax return to the annual Tax Day bash at Jake's Grill in the Governor Hotel gets a $10.40 gift certificate to ease his or her pain. É Most celebrants, I'm told, wisely invest their windfall immediately in distillery products. É Morning DJ Bob Miller, currently holding forth at KEX (1190 AM) before making the big move to KPAM (860 AM), asks: 'If I dine at Shari's 24 times, can I get a free windshield?' If you don't get it, never mind. É Thanks to a lot of good people out there, Cameron Low is going to make it to the national junior high chess tournament in Florida later this month. É We raised enough to get him there Ñ plus another couple of hundred bucks that will be used to start a college fund for the Kellogg middle-schooler. Cameron says he's going to write a thank you note to everyone who sent in a donation, and that's a promise.

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Surely, someone out there knows what happened to Marjorie Smith, who, back in the '50s, made the front pages when her husband's car blew up in the parking lot of Columbia-Edgewater Country Club, killing him instantly. ÉÊThe family gardener Ñ Marjorie's 'love slave,' as the newspapers put it Ñ quickly confessed, describing in lurid detail how he and Marjorie had planned the car bombing together. Marjorie, however, claimed innocence and, looking frail and demure on the witness stand, she was acquitted at trial. É According to one well-traveled source, the highlight of last Friday night's Portland Art Museum festivities marking the opening of the 'Becoming a Nation' exhibit had to be Oregon's own former Miss America Katie Harman singing 'God Bless America.' É The same source wonders aloud how long it will be before the Gresham lass announces her candidacy for some suitable public office. Sounds like a prediction to me.

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Charlie Brown, former Lewis & Clark rowing coach and a champion rower himself, crossed the finish line last week after a six-year battle with leukemia. A memorial is planned for next Saturday afternoon at the college chapel. He was 40 years old. É His friend and fellow rowing instructor, Boats Johnson, recalls that toward the end Charlie spent a good deal of time in meditation. 'You know,' he told Boats after one such session, 'there really is laughter at the gateway.' For now, we'll just have to take his word.

Contact Phil Stanford by phone at 503-546-5166 or by e-mail at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .