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Mark & Dave: Anybody know what street fee is all about?


Photo Credit: PAMPLIN MEDIA GROUP - Mark & Dave on AM860.Update on the Portland street fee, er, tax, er, levy, er fund. … The final vote has been pushed back, again, to Jan. 14 at the earliest, according to the Portland Tribune. There have been so many incarnations of this proposal we don’t know what’s in it anymore, and we dare you to figure it out, too. If they had to sell it in front of the "Shark Tank" sharks, their reaction would be the same as yours: “I’m out.”

One other thought on the street fee, er, tax, er, levy, er, fund. Why not just call it what it is? Street FUBAR.

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Well, here’s proof it does no good to work out. City Commissioner Nick Fish’s bike was stolen outside 24 Hour Fitness in Hollywood. He did all the right things, but thieves managed to take his ride anyway. Now that he has to drive his car to get around, we wonder if he'll change his mind and vote yes for a street fee.

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Things are changing in Vancouver, Wash. They may not want a Portland-style light-rail system, but they would love to have a version of Seattle’s Pike Place Market. Plans are floating around to turn the old Red Lion Inn into a large farmers market. Only problem, Seattle is on Puget Sound; Vancouver is on the Columbia River. So, while our neighbors to the north are tossing exotic swordfish and yellowfin tuna, what would our local fish mongers throw? Flying carp or sturgeon don’t exactly make for tourist photo ops.

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Uber says it will stand down for 90 days while the City of Portland works to update its taxi regulations. If the city fails, Uber once again will offer ride-share services without permits. Gee, wonder what would happen if we refused to pay our property taxes until the county lowered them.

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Microsoft’s Bing search engine revealed its predictions for 2015.

Turtlenecks will be in fashion (glad we saved ours), hummus will be the most popular food in America (over our emaciated bodies), “Boyhood” will win the Academy Award for Best Picture, and Beyoncé will take home the Grammy for Album of the Year. It also predicts the Seahawks will not win the Super Bowl (they won’t even be in it), and that the Ducks will start 2015 by losing to Florida State. Ouch. We thought Microsoft was a Northwest company.

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Ever wonder what happens if a resident on Portland’s Peacock Lane dies? We did. So when we had a chance to speak with a homeowner on the "Mark & Dave Show," we asked. Does the house go dark? Turns out, it has happened and others on the famous street just rally to decorate for them. After all, the show must go on, as well it should.

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Pambiche restaurant’s Juanito Carbonera welcomed the news of normalized relations with his ancestral family’s Cuba. The eatery’s exotic Spanish cuisine, already a big hit with diners, surely will find more delighted palates. But don’t be fooled thinking this is what Cubans eat every day. Carbonera reminded us that the tropical Caribbean root vegetables, roasted meats, plantains, hearty stews, deep-fried delicacies, rum, rice and beans he serves is not a daily staple in that country.

“It’s so poor, you have to make one clove of garlic last a whole week,” he said. So, for now, our trip to Cuba will be the corner table, thank you.

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Today was supposed to be the day that Sony Pictures released “The Interview” with Seth Rogan and James Franco. That’s the ill-fated film that was pulled from theaters under threat of violence from supposed North Korea hackers.

We’re not sure what to be more mad about: That they forced Americans to capitulate or that their hackers appear to better than our hackers.

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Little ol’ Corvallis made No. 4 on WalletHub’s list of best college towns in America. No other Northwest town cracked the top 30. Or 40, for that matter. We can’t figure it out. Now if we can just get the Beavers into a top 10 list, we’ll be happy.

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The Northwest’s Urban Death Project is maybe three years away from human composting. What?!? Yes. Katrina Spade tells us the idea is to fold you back into the Earth. For the record, one human makes about one cubic yard of compost, enough to plant a tree or vegetable garden. Could work, she says.

Makes us worry — we may be only a few years removed from “Soylent Green" food carts.

Listen to Mark and Dave 3 to 6 p.m. weekdays on AM 860 KPAM. Follow them at: http://www.facebook.com/themarkanddaveshow.