Mark & Dave: Fear GMOs? Chew on idea of fizzy apples

Published 12:00 am Thursday, October 30, 2014

Not sure what one of these a day will do, but there’s an apple about to hit the market with its own built-in fizz. It’s described as a sparkling fruit that bubbles when you bite. If that’s not reason to vote yes on Measure 92, we don’t know what is.

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Measure 92 continues to rack up money. Next Tuesday’s vote on GMO labeling will be the most expensive campaign in Oregon history. For Measure 92 alone, the number was more than $17 million at press time. If voter turnout matches the 2010 Oregon mid-term election, that’s roughly $11-plus per voter and climbing. Our family would just as soon take the cash, thank you.

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A new study says teens buy fewer sugary drinks if they are informed of the “exercise cost” of downing a Coke or Pepsi. So if you saw a sign at the drive-through that said “working off this soda requires 50 minutes of running,” would you buy it? Sure, it’s dumbed down, but it’s effective. But that’s just for teens. We figure the adult verbiage would read “Buy this large soda, get 50 percent off larger pants.”

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A new study from a vitamin brand reveals the number of days women spend in a grumpy mood. The answer is, wait for it … 10 days per year. In the survey, women said they were grumpy about five hours a week. Men said it was more like eight hours. Then a cold silence fell over the room. You know what we’re talking about.

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Some things just don’t make any sense. For example, the terror group ISIL is earning $1 million a day selling oil. How is that legal? We can’t build a fence over 6 feet without a permit from the city.

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If you haven’t stocked up on Halloween candy yet, why not stock the best? Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups are ranked America’s favorite this year. That is, until pot candies pop up on the market next year.

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Based on SAT scores from random colleges, a software writer has charted musical tastes of smart people and dumb people. The intellectual elite prefer Radiohead. Less intelligent people get down with Beyonce. And really dumb students enjoy anything played with spoons.

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Either this is the greatest app ever, or it signals our decline into mediocrity. The PhotoMath app will solve math problems for you just by pointing your smartphone’s camera at the problem. It’ll even show you how the answer was calculated. It’s scheduled for release next year. Just in time to calculate the complicated Portland street fees.

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Good help is hard to find in Silicon Valley. Thus, the invention of the latest hire perk: The Pre-cation. You get two weeks paid vacation before you start the job. Unless it’s a government job, then you go straight to pre-tirement.

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How was this not invented in Portland? A craft beer from Spain claims you can drink all you want and never get a hangover. The secret is the brew process, which uses deep ocean seawater. It’s mineral rich, almost like a sports drink, thus leaving you headache-free the next morning. We’re guessing it’s up to you to get rid of the fish breath.

Listen to Mark and Dave 3 to 6 p.m. weekdays on AM 860 KPAM. Follow them at http://www.facebook.com/themarkanddaveshow.