When a new year hangover pounces, solutions are nearby

If you started the new year with a bang, I bet that's the last thing you want to hear right now. You're the original mouse that's not even stirring.

We're here to help you get back on your feet.

Let's deal with some simple questions.

Why do I feel so bad?

1) Alcohol diminishes your body's ability to retain water. Your brain shrank (which may explain some of the things you did last night), and what hurts now is the lining surrounding it. Next time, drink water before you go to bed.

2) Actually, alcohol's not the main problem: What hurt you are impurities like sulfites and other additives used to stabilize colors. Bubbly drinks like champagne absorb fast and can really smart. So can dark or sticky drinks.

3) Feel a bit sick? Your brain figured out you poisoned yourself, and it's trying to get rid of the alcohol.

So what can I do?

1) Go for a run or get some other exercise. You'll feel better.

2) Take a long, hot bath or sauna and sweat out the alcohol.

3) Go back to sleep.

What can I take?

Aspirin or an aspirin substitute is the first thought. But warning labels advise against such remedies after three drinks (so about 7:30 last night was too late) because of the risk of liver damage from acetaminophen (Tylenol).

1) Try freshly squeezed orange juice. An ayurvedic Hindu recipe calls for a teaspoonful of lime juice as well.

2) How about an aromatherapy cocktail? Mix together four ounces of water, the juice of half a lemon and a drop of fennel oil.

3) There's a homeopathic solution called nux vomica. Take one tablet every three or four hours. You can find it in health food stores.

4) Blend 8 ounces carrot juice, 1 ounce beet juice, 4 ounces celery juice and 1 ounce parsley juice (which has to be the first time parsley is good for anything).

5) E-mergen-C tablets have vitamins B and C to replace what you killed.

6) Gulps of pure oxygen were reportedly favored by World War II bomber crews.

But I'm hungry

1) A hangover breakfast recipe includes tomato juice, two raw eggs and black coffee. Be advised, however, that raw eggs can contain salmonella bacteria.

2) Hilda's Hangover Cocktail contains 1 can tomato juice,

3 teaspoonfuls vinegar, 2 lemons,

4 onion slices, 3 tablespoons sugar,

4 stalks celery,

3 tablespoons Tabasco sauce, and pinches of salt and pepper.

3) A Chinese remedy calls for tangerine juice or a dozen strawberries Ñ if you can find them this time of year.

4) How about hangover stew? Hungarians have goulash, French have potage St. Germain, Greeks have white bean soup and Mexicans have menudo. Menudo is a hearty tripe soup from the north of Mexico and is especially recommended as a hangover cure.

Look up the recipe on the Web at

Hair of the dog

This phrase comes from a medieval English theory that hairs from a rabid dog should be applied to the bite it gave you. Which may be as sound as this modern application.

1) Fernet Branca: Italian blend of herbs and tree roots should be mixed 4 parts Fernet Branca,

1 part vermouth, 2 parts gin. Or try it in espresso.

2) Royal Peter: Peter the Great swore by warm brandy spiced with pepper, but then Russian winters are very cold.

3) Tiger's Milk: 1 shot Bacardi rum, 1 shot Cognac, half cup cream, half cup milk. Flavor with nutmeg and shake.

4) Black Velvet: Mix equal parts champagne and Guinness.

A couple of these and you'll be ready for another nap, which is probably what your body needs anyway. Just don't miss the Oregon-Colorado game.

Contact Paul Duchene at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..

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